1. Your church is unwelcoming.
This goes well beyond having designated “greeters” at the front door or out in the parking lot. (Although, if you don’t have anyone designated to say hello to visitors on Sunday morning, chances are some visitors will easily get overlooked and that will foster an unwelcoming atmosphere.) If the people in a church don’t get excited when new faces and people drop by, your church is unwelcoming.
2. Your church does not like your church.
When a church becomes ingrown, it starts bickering and fighting constantly. Everyone on the inside turns against others who are inside. People who visit instantly sense a combatant culture and are naturally turned off by the apparent “lack of unity” within the church. If your church doesn’t like your church, nobody else is going to like your church. It starts from the inside out, kind of like how Jesus said the inside of a cup must be clean in order for it to be holy. A church must like itself before it can ever be considered attractive by others.
3. Your church doesn't notice visitors.
Someone walks through the doors of your church, and nobody seems to care. They went through the service and afterward were able to walk out without having a single, normal, human conversation with others in the room. People who have known one another for years, or who are part of the “in” club chat, but they don’t embrace those who are different from themselves. That happens regularly in churches across America and is a reason why so many churches are half-empty rather than half full.
4. Your church is boring.
This has nothing to do with worship style or fog machines, but it has everything to do with the people behind the singing, reciting, praying, preaching, and attending. Do a majority of members in the church actually want to be there? Do they genuinely enjoy glorifying God each Sunday? Do they enjoy being in God’s presence? Do they enjoy being next to the people around them and with God’s people even after Sunday’s service ends?
Passion and zeal for the preaching of the word of God spreads like wildfire. Good, sound preaching is contagious. People get excited about inviting others to a church that blesses them personally. The inverse is also true. When nobody wants to go to church, but they go through the motions and show up, visitors don’t want to be there either and eventually, they stop coming.
5. Your church has “nobody” in it.
Smaller churches tend to stay small. A large part of this is psychological. When a visitor walks into a large room full of empty chairs or pews, it signals to that person that something must be wrong (even if and when nothing is!). It’s like walking into an empty restaurant. The first thought that comes to mind is: Is no one here because the food isn’t any good? Yes, people will make that same assumption with your church.
6. Your church does not like people.
If your church loves ideas more than people, then you can’t expect anyone to come to your church. We are not floating minds in a room, or brains on a stick, but we are embodied—fully human—beings. That means that we are social and relational, and if we’re not, then we don’t like people other than ourselves.
It's equally true that if the senior pastor or church leadership does not really like people, that the church culture is going to be one of not liking people—and therefore, not welcoming or getting to know people. If little to no effort is made to know real people, it's no wonder why nobody likes your church.
7. Your church does not like your city or community.
If your pastor constantly rails against “the culture” and never affirms anything in the city or community, chances are that attitude will trickle down into the ethos and fabric of the whole church. Quickly, a congregation becomes us vs. them about everything (other local or regional churches, other communities, and nearby cities).
Common sermon applications in these churches make fun of nearby Christians and neighboring churches. The mentality is, “We are better,” or “We are the only church that does it the right way.” or “We’re the best in town.” This spirit of competition is opposed to the kingdom of Christ.
Maybe you don’t have a “culture warrior,” casting-fire-and-brimstone-from-behind-the-pulpit mentality, but if your church never engages the local community and regional city around it, what gets communicated is that you don’t care about your city or community.
If your church comes across as either hostile or indifferent to the place it’s located and the people who live around where the church gathers, then those vibes will reach every visitor that walks through the door (if visitors walk through the doors, chances are, they won’t)—and the message will be received loud and clear: your church does not like anybody else and does not care about anybody else.
8. Your church has no plan to reach new people.
If your church has no desire, vision, any initiatives, or a plan to reach out to others, it’s never going to reach out to other people. And the simple reason for this is: there’s no motivation. People are comfortable with who they see regularly, so if they’re never stretched or challenged to move beyond the comfort zone—chances are people never will.
Evangelism and outreach have to be on the forefront—not in the background—of everyone’s mind. Invitations and calls to “Taste and see that the Lord is good!” have to be on the lips and in the lives of everybody who goes to your church. This is every Christian’s responsibility.
I’m surprised at how little effort churches make to reach people in their immediate neighborhoods. It’s as simple as having some marketing materials to pass out that explain who you are and that invite people to come to your church, intentionally organizing groups of people from your church to flyer, pass out invitations, or table at community events. And perhaps the most important, word of mouth by members to neighbors next door.
9. Your church is dying.
Literally, it’s possible that your church is full of one demographic that is aging and has not managed to reach out to the next generation or pass on the Christian faith very well. Or maybe, your church is so full of hipster millennials that it doesn’t have room for anybody else. In either case, whether the demographic is mostly old or mostly young, the church is not healthy. An unhealthy church might be well-liked by one demographic, but it's excluding a lot of other people who should be part of the church. So it's not liked and it’s dying.
10. Your church is faithful.
(**I made this one the last point because it’s far too easy for us to let our own church off the hook way too soon.)
Make sure that your church has exhausted every other possibility first before assuming that your church isn’t growing "because it’s faithful.” Often, we’re just lazy or apathetic about it and it has nothing to do with genuine faithfulness to God and reaching out in love to our neighbors and neighborhoods.
With that said, it is possible that your church is doing everything right, and still, nobody in the town or city cares about your church. That’s a possibility and if that’s the case, and the gospel is being faithfully preached week after week with all the intentionality in the world to reach out to others nearby, then God bless you in your faithful ministry. Sometimes a church may not be very fruitful, even when it has been faithful. But the kind of fruit it bears will manifest itself in the people it shepherds.
